Bad ways to set yourself apart in an interview

These are all true stories.

Certainly, there has been no better time in recent history to set yourself apart at an interview. Here are a few ways, however, that this particular recruiter frowns upon:

1. Wearing what the client will later describe to me as "some sort of huge, bright blue jumpsuit" to your interview. Especially when you are a 300-pound-man.
2. Arriving in a cowboy hat that you refuse to take off, even when the interviewer invites you to store said rodeo attire in the coat closet.
3. Jokingly suggesting that the interviewer invest in some Rogaine.
4. Describing your capabilities as a work horse as follows: "Well, Tony. You can just strap a saddle on and ride me!"
5. Using the term "tough titties" in conversation with the female HR representative.
6. Getting arrested two days prior to the interview, then acting surprised that the potential employer has read about you in the news.
7. Asking mid-interview if the interviewer and his/her colleagues like to go out and "get f*cked up" when they travel for work.

In 100% of instances above, the end result was not an employment offer.